Some people believe that all gay men are shallow when seeking someone for a permanent relationship with. But that just isn’t how it is. Of course many of us prefer someone who is healthy as well as physically fit; pretty much everyone wants that, right? In fact sometimes it is hard for the ones that do not fit that type to find a partner. It is more of a challenge for gay men because they are in a minority. Some gay men are shallow and there's not a lot you can do to change that. My belief is that if they don't find you attractive they're not worth losing any sleep over and you can probably do a lot better.
With age comes wisdom, and as gay men mature, they will tend to mellow out and look for someone who is more of a friend than just a hot body. In the meantime, you are likely stuck playing the game and going to the gym regularly so that you can increase your pick up potential. Looks tends to be very important to younger gay men, but it is not the only thing. Most guys do not want to date someone that is fat. Personally for me I have to be very attracted to the person before I even have any idea's about approaching another man, let alone start a relationship with them. I guess that makes me shallow, but satisfied.
Why are so many young gay men interested in slim trim athletic types? Guys in general are sexual creatures and want to have sex with good looking guys. This also holds true for many young men are only looking for sex and not any form of long term commitment. But with varying 'attractive' criteria in different cultures, it is still possible for chubby men to get action. It really does not matter the reasons why people choose the way they do. Some people just behave this way when it comes to picking a potential life partner its just who they are.
Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against people who don't measure up to my standards as far a dating goes, most of them are nice people but I just would not consider dating them. I have some great friends that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world, and I met most of them online. That's right, as a matter of fact most of the guys I have dated in the past few years I have met through internet dating sites. You might think that I am callous because I can see what they look like before I put the moves on them, but it is more than that. Many of them are people that I happened to meet in chat rooms on dating sites and I became interested in them because of what they had to say. I have not dated many of them, but I do consider many of them to be among my circle of friends now. Besides, one of the best advantages of online dating is that when you just don't have the time to go out socializing, it's an easy way to meet and interact with people and it's fun.
I think I am at that cusp in my life where I am transitioning from casual pickups to a long term commitment. I am not quite ready to make the commitment jump yet, but I am thinking that a few longer term relationships might help me get past the fear that I have of being exclusive with just one person. Thats where the online dating comes in, you see when you join an online dating site both you and he know where each other stands so there's no surprises. If you hook up and it turns out that you're not really interested in a particular person but you sense their being a little pushy just move on to the next person, no harm done. And if by chance they start to hassle you online, well all you have to do is block them, with online dating sites your real email address phone number and address are never given out so there's no worry about someone spying on you following you unless you were stupid and gave them your personal contact information already. The best thing though is that most of the men on dating sites are just like you, and are unlikely to push themselves on someone where the affection is not being returned.
For the most part most men do not care so much what you look like, or how you style your hair or whether or not you work out or not. They just want to find someone compatible. They would like someone with similar interests, who is intellectually challenging and has compatible personality traits. Someone who is compassionate, caring and giving. A person who stimulates them both intellectually, emotionally and sexually. A friend with benefits.
So if you want to expand your horizons, consider joining an online dating site. There are many, many really solid sites out there that are totally committed to helping you find someone special in your life. They have members from all walks of life and cultures all looking for someone to share their time and lives with. So why wait? Get off your tush, get online and check them out. You won't be disappointed. At worst you will meet a lot of interesting people that you will come to regard as friends, even if they never make it to lovers. Below is the link to the site that I use, they have so many sites to chose from, I'm sure you'll find one that has what your looking for.
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/gaydating.php
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