If you are looking for advice on how to date women, then this post hopefully will give you a few courses of action. When you treat women correctly on the first date, they will likely be open for other dates, regardless of what you look like or your financial position. There is one key ingredient, and that is charm, charm, charm. Although there is such a thing as too flattering, girls will tend to forgive that. There is however, a few must not dos such as:
1) Do not kowtow to her excessively such as
a. Making her feel so important that you look needy. If you are praising her or giving her a complement, do it jokingly. You will achieve the complement yet still appearing to be a person of substance and stature.
b. Asking her to compare you former lovers – on a first date you will look like less because of the lack of history Do not push this rhetorical button; it is too soon to get into this level of feedback.
c. Delegating control of the date to her. Questions should not be open ended. If you are not sure of what she wants, then give her a list of two, or at most three choices of things to do next. If she is not happy with any of the choices, then you have have not done sufficient research as to what her needs are. You have screwed up, you deserve to be dumped. (On subsequent dates, you can ask for ideas, but on a first date you should appear to be in control, well planned, but flexible).
2) The next common mistake is trying to impress her too much. Do not boast and crow, and do not say how much money you make. Just be a considerate partner, hear and remember what she says, and pick up the bill. Date one is female centric, it is not about you. If she wants to know more about you, then give them a solid well thought out answer but no answer should take longer than one minute, or else you are in the danger zone of saying too much and coming across as boasting or bragging.
3) Do not put her on a pedestal. That advice is more important if the woman is very pretty. Very pretty women are used to being on a pedestal. Did you ever notice how often that really attractive women are hanging out with hoodlums? That is because hoods treat them normally and they feel like they are being appreciated for what they are. In many cases the hoods are abusive, but they like that because at least the bum is treating them differently than everyone else does. Nothing is more tiring to attractive women as getting hit on – they have heard it all before. The more successful tack is to just ask them something about themselves, such as what they are doing, where they work, etc.
4) Wanting to go steady too soon in a relationship. Both you and her should be obviously playing the field initially. If you come across as someone who would commit exclusively either on or just after the first date, you will seem needy and diminished in their eyes. No woman wants to be dating a needy loser. You have to come across as successful in relationships, and therefore desirable in her eyes.
If you are having trouble getting a desirable woman, then try the following pages to help you zero in on the kind of female that you desire:
Free Personals
Adult Dating
Mature Dating
Gay Dating
Lesbian Dating
Swinger
Couple Dating
Top Ten Dating
Top 100 Personals
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Pluses of Online Dating
One of the most amazing things that modern technology has offered to the human race is the entire new way that it is possible to meet someone new. Yes, I am talking about online dating sites. In the hundreds of thousands of years that human beings have been meeting and interacting with each other, there has never been anything that approaches the reach, the utility, and the convenience of online dating.
Up until the last decade, you were very limited by distance and connections. In most cases, people met someone within a few miles of where they happened to be living, working or going to school at the time. With online dating, it is now totally possible to meet someone from any corner of the world. This is true, literally, figuratively and actually! The most amazing thing is that you can look through what they say about themselves and shortlist a bunch of people that you are interested in that also have some things in common with you. On top of this, most dating systems have searching algorithms that will help you find all those people in the first place. It is just so amazingly easy.
Minuses of Online Dating
Online dating sites are not foolproof. One problem is that people say what they are looking for, but they really do not know exactly what they want. People are much better at saying what they do not want in a partner than they are in saying what they want. Even so, people will often end up falling for someone who has many characteristics that they say they would not touch with a ten foot pole. On top of all that, online dating sites are the victims of members who exaggerate about themselves a lot, or just plain lie. For example, the hot young woman you think you’ve been chatting up online could be a 500 pound rat-catcher from Arsspik, Siberia. Or vise versa. Men and women both tend to post younger and more flattering pictures of themselves before they gained 40 pounds, and had more hair. You just never really know if the person you are interacting with is telling the truth. Be careful! Lots of married men and women troll dating sites looking for some action on the side. So keep your BS detector set to maximum sensitivity.
The bigger dating sites will actually have millions of profiles for you to search through, and that is a curse! Even with the computerized help, the task is daunting. How can you zero in better? Of course if you are like me you just need to search for "deaf, dumb, oversexed female who owns liquor store"!
Other Online Dating Recommendations
A name like THREEINCHTOOL is unlikely to gain you much positive attention after all. Chose a name that nobody would be embarrassed to say that they are looking at your profile. Another gem of advice is to let out your personal details gradually. Do not rush it. Pacing out the release of your personal information will give you more chances to dig out the details on them. During this time period, ask some of the same questions in slightly different ways, and look for inconsistencies. Someone who is lying will slip up. Talk on the phone a few times before meeting in person. Use a phone anonymizing service for the first few calls to protect you from any potential wackos that you might connect with.
Use a recent, accurate picture of yourself. You want them to like you for who you are, so present that person from the get-go. Do not put up a picture on your profile that you would be ashamed to show in public. You may be tempted to do something daring, but do not. You will only attract the wrong crowd. Also, although dating sites are supposed to be anonymous, pictures are not, and someone you know may recognize you, so do not put up any sort of compromising picture. When talking online, do not whine! Keep anything that mentions past relationships on the up and up. Relationships end all the time, and likely because both parties were at fault to some extent. Do not try to shift all the blame to your ex, that makes you look like someone who is not accountable for their actions, and that is a huge turn off for most women.
When it comes to you first 'in person' date, there are a few things you can do to make it more likely to be positive. Chose a time to meet early in the day, preferably over a coffee. Nobody expects a coffee date to last a long time, and if you decide it is not going to work out, you do not have to manufacture an excuse to leave. Second, if your date is not over coffee, set your phone alarm to go off a half hour into the date. That way, if it’s not going well, you can jet with an excuse. Lastly, let them know you’re also seeing other people. It is best to be honest, and ask them for the same thing.
If you are truly fortunate, the chemistry will be amazing and you will click as soon as you meet. If not, then there is always the next lucky lady. Good luck!
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Online Dating Survey Results:
The following is a summary of a study of about 100 or so urban dwellers in how they look for people to date. Dating Online may not result in you getting the person of your dreams, but it may be an interesting diversion from all those hard to believe Match.com and eHarmony.com commercial breaks that try to convince you about how lonely you are during the late winter/early spring/ mid summer blahs.
<bold>Some Dating Insights Gained:</bold>
1) It is not uncommon for members of the online dating community to be members on various sites at the same time. The attitude is that the more exposure you give yourself to other people, the more likely it is that you will find a match. Sort of like buying several lottery tickets instead of just one. These same people are likely to be dating several different people concurrently hoping to find the one who clicks. In any event, you would want to play the field until you find someone that you really bond with. After all, in real life, you are probably meeting a friend of a friend, or at least have had some opportunity to watch them interact with other people at your favorite watering hole. That tends to prescreen the people that you would actually go out with before you make any sort of commitment to one-on-one dating. In actual fact, in most conventional dating scenes, you are actually doing some multi-tasking on the pre-screening front before you ever interact in the first place. Because of the anonymous nature of online dating sites, you cannot prescreen people through friends before meeting them. One way dating sites try to mitigate that is via chat and anonymous email, but even so, once you meet in real life for the first time, it has more of the hallmarks of a blind date that any other dating situation that you have found yourself in. With this high tendency not to hit it off on the first actual date, the online dating community tends to interact with more people at the same time, and as a consequence, they are more tolerant of people playing the field during the initial relationship phases.
2) Online Dating is much more superficial – pictures and videos are everything – without them you get almost no action, or attention. And you ladies need not worry, as long as you have a reasonably flattering shot of yourself having fun someplace, you will likely get responses from lots of men. This is a marketing exercise, not a life story exercise. If you are selling beauty products on television you do not explain each step of the research that lead to the product. Although you might mention the research, you tend to focus on the results, and the benefits. Market yourself in a positive and flattering manner. Whatever you do, do not post a picture of yourself that is taken with your web cam – the video quality sucks, and you can never show yourself in a socially fun situation with a web cam For women, since men do not read much, you have to be reasonably brief in what you say, but it also needs to be fun and engaging if you hope to have him read. Watch the movie “Must Love Dogs” for ideas in how to market yourself on an internet dating site. If you are a man – pay attention to the words as best you can – look for the “must not be” things that many women pre-qualify their profiles with, and do not annoy them if you are a “must not be” person. Women are generally strong communicators; hopefully having to read “likes long walks on the beach” for the umpteenth time will not make you lose your cookies. In any event, for both sexes, keep the profile text fun, factual and short. If you are lucky, you will find other people with similar interests and a complimentary sense of silliness. The anonymous chat and email services are there for your benefit and safety. Use them extensively before agreeing to meet in person for the first time. Do not be too verbose in you profile. Your profile is a short teaser ad that highlights your benefits to catch someone's eye. Do not pollute it with negative statements of past failures. You are trying to sell someone about who you are and where you want to go. You do not want to bore them with the history of your life, all your mistakes, and what you changed your mind about.
3) Men without strong advancement prospects, or God forbid, no jog at all will find it difficult making much headway on some specialty dating sites where people are focused on success. In their heads, women are looking for winners, not losers. On the other hand, if you can hook a woman physically or emotionally, they will often overlook the fact that you are stock shelves in a grocery store, as long as you are able to show her that you have solid future prospects. Keep your personal financial status out of the conversation if at all possible. If the person keeps insisting on focusing on that particular statistic, they just might be a gold digger
4) Full figured women are actually not at the disadvantage that they often think they are. As long as you do not have flab's of cellulite hanging several inches under your arms, you likely have a solid chance of getting the favorable attention of most men. If you are not wider than you are tall, then likely you have a pretty good chance of finding someone. Since most women will often post a younger, or more flattering photo of themselves, they will often attract men online. Coupled with shaving a few years off of their ages is also done with great regularity. Men will often lie about their income, but are usually quite truthful about their ages. Men are almost always athletic or average, and almost none admit to being overweight or obese.
5) Love does not actually happen online – love can only happen after you meet. You either totally connect and love someone, or you do not. It is the little interactions that result in a strong attraction that can lead to love, but that is often fillial love, not eros love. It takes chemistry between two individuals when they kiss, and have sex that leads to truly erotic, head over heals love. In the online dating world, from the time you first start to interact online to the time you meet in person is about two to four weeks. If you are too cautious, then the person will likely meet someone else in the meantime, and you will fail. Don't forget, if you are attracted to them, then others will be too, and since everyone on dating sites are trying to meet as many people as is reasonably possible, you are in a time limited competition to win their hearts.
6) There is still a social stigma associated with online dating. The real problem with online personals sites is that they have had a reputation in the past for being the hangouts of losers and predators. Nothing is further from the truth. Unfortunately, many people refuse to even try online dating because of these factors. The fact is that one in five relationships at the current time are people who met online.. You are likely more at risk in conventional dating as you are with online dating. Most people who meet and fall in love online do not broadcast how they met to the world at large, so all you hear about is the people who were not successful on dating sites. This leaves a bad negative impression of the online dating industry in the public eye. This tendency to be closed-mouthed is kind of silly because everyone knows that people who date to have met at some time, so why try to hide it.
7) The real power of dating sites is their ability to match people up who are in completely different social circles, and therefore would never have met through any conventional means. Since everyone on a dating site is there for the same reason, you will find it amazing how easy it is to talk to other people about your wants and needs in a relationship. These social dating sites are the ideal place for busy professionals or single parents. Who has the time to hang out in bars with a bunch of underage teens with forged identity? There is not enough hours in the day, so if you want to meet someone, then you should take your search online to make more productive use of your limited time. Online dating is the wave of the present and future if you want to find successful and interesting people. No matter if the forum is online dating or bar hopping, when it comes to finding the person of your dreams, you will likely have to kiss a few frogs along the way. So just get out into that real world or Internet marshland and get on with it.
If you are interested in online dating sites, then you might want to check out this resource page:
Online Dating
